Thursday, January 29, 2009

half time - by b

we are half way through our time here---mas o menos. and some of you now know that we are thinking of possibly staying another year.

or not

auuuuurrrghhh!!! what to do???

sure we have some months before we are scheduled to return to s.f..... lotsa time to decide. but certain people need to know now (or reasonably soon) principally the kids' schools here and there.

what do i want to do?


my feelings on this matter have not changed ... but the nature in which i feel them has. In the early days here these feelings came to me in an almost euphoric way... I would walk around the city ecstatic wanting both san francisco and barcelona, wanting to never die because i wanted to cram it ALL in, wanting somehow to live this life and then know i would get the chance to live another. they were impossible feelings... yet impossibly happy.

now i just think about it.... and it is a pain in the culito....

soon we'll decide one way or another .. and accept the decision.. but for now ....

i suppose its appropriate i went out alone the other night to see woody allen's "vicky cristina barcelona" ... kristin had seen it before we left the states and i somehow didn't get around to it

it's a movie about wanting it all.. and, of course, not being able to have it all

yo entiendo